the queen bee flirt

something that has come up for me a few times since adolescence, is the existence of a particularly intriguing brand of woman: the queen bee flirt. you may have come across a few at a party or within your own social circle: they can easily be recognised by their flirtatious behaviour, whilst preening in the company of many adoring men (or 'subjects' as they'd prefer to call them).

 angelina jolie - the ultimate queen bee. knock it the fuck down if seen.

it seems terribly harmless - a self-appointed queen, desperate for male validation as she bends over in front of her worker bees with a short skirt on, stroking male egos as she oozes through a social gathering like honey. the queen bee flirt can be gorgeous (a double threat) but is often just like you and i, only armed with skills we can't begin to fathom. she was either naturally born with the ability to put out sexual cues or she's studied them because she was once absolutely hideous. us women titter amongst ourselves, cackling at her ability to turn men's brains into microwaved oats with one swish of a self-aware, calculated pose. we all agree that we have no desire nor compulsion to act the same way (but secretly know that we don't even possess the tools or knowledge to apply such skill when needed).

but then she turns her attention to your husband, boyfriend or the object of your affection and things go beehive-shaped fast. in fact, if you have a queen bee friend, she'll go out of her way to seduce the affections of any man connected to you, even if she has voiced her disdain for this man, and has absolutely no interest in him. you'll be forced to witness the microwaving of his brain in front of your very eyes in slow-motion, as you run from the other side of the room, diving between the two of them in an attempt to absorb her seductive rays and charisma from doing its worst job yet. even if you beg her to spare just this one male brain, she'll laugh coquettishly and spin on her heels. no man is safe from this woman. she must create a kingdom of drones and will never be satisfied until she is recognised as queen. 

how to combat a queen bee:

i give you now an excerpt from an article on queen honey bees:

The queen honeybee is irresistible to worker bees. Now we know why.
The queen, who produces the most complex pheromone known in the animal world, has at her command a cache of chemicals to make other bees do her bidding. She uses this powerful and seductive perfume to attract a retinue of worker bees that lick and groom her and carry chemical signals back to the rest of the hive.

there is no hope.